Altered Yard Sale Signs

This is a list of things I came up with for my "Yard Sale Sign Alteration" idea from an earlier post.

No Space Aliens
Free Hot Dogs & Soda
Free Beer/Soda/Water
Free Lemonade
Come And Donate Blood
Raffle @Noon for 42" Visio Flatscreen TV (new in box)
Free Massages (No Happy Endings)
Slightly Used Adult Toys
Beer For The Men, Wine For The Ladies, Benadryl For The Kids
No Pigs Allowed (yeah you, copper)
No Hippies
No Kids or Babies Allowed
Free Second-Hand Movie Popcorn
Lemon Mine
Military Grade Explosives
Western Re-enactments
No Metal-Heads
Free Beer For Teens
Democrats Only Please
Republicans Only Please
Don't Drink The Kool-Aid!
Live Performance by ChemDawg
Live Music by Alex Cooper
Porn Star Memorabilia
Live Performance by The Dancing Obamas
Help Us Burn Barney The Dinosaur In Effigy!

I just came up with another great idea...Fake Yard Sales! Here's how it's done:

Drive around & find a random address or ten and write them down
Go Home
Gather some materials to make yard sale signs
Make up random Yard Sale signs using the addresses you have written down
        (Make sure to make three or more for each address. Alot of signs, folks)
Include great percs like Free Lemonade & Free Hot Dogs & Soda
One sign announces a Raffle for a 42" Visio Flatscreen TV @Noon
Go back out and post the signs and all necessary support signs (arrows, etc)
Get some sleep
Get up next morning
Go to the addresses indicated on your fake signs and watch the pandemonium
Fake Yard Sale Fun!

Another great idea! The Ghostly Yard Sale!

Make signs for an address near you that DOESN'T EXIST
Include items too good to pass up (we want traffic)
Go out and post them
Go home and sleep
Get up
Sit outside all day
Hopefully, eventually, someone will ask you about the phony address. And here's the fun part:
Get a weird look on your face, indicating creeped out-ness
Tell them that there USED to be a house there a year ago
Indicate where it USED to be by pointing or indicating
Relate the story about how the family that lived in the house that USED to be there had a yard sale, followed by a barbecue, and that night, their house burned down, killing the entire family.
Watch the person to see their reaction to the tale
Enjoy the results!

And the coup de grace, the Fake Party!

Find a good address & write it down (cul de sac is great!)
Go Home
Make Signs
Go out and post signs
Show up for the "party" with a bunch of friends, making sure to act really, really pumped.
Bring booze, sexily clad girls, etc.
Watch the reaction

And here is a sample idea for a Fake Party sign:

BIG PUBLIC PARTY FRIDAY NIGHT (2/15/2013) 5pm-??am
Everyone 16+ Invited
No RSVP Needed! Just Show Up @ 5pm!
Early Birds Get The Worm! Know What I'm Saying? I Think You Do!
Live Music, Drinking Games, And FREE CONDOMS!
(No Means No, Yes Means Oh Yeah Baby!)
BYOB, illicit substance, or both!
NO POLICE OR OTHER BUZZ KILLINGTONS ALLOWED
42165 La Serena Way, Temecula, CA 92591
(for directions, call 951-696-5849 or 951-696-4876)
Live Music by The Deadbeat Bastards, Andy Rogynous, & Butter Top

Make sure to show up! Tell them where you saw the sign if they ask what you're doing there. Be obnoxious but friendly.

Other Stuff that would be funny to offer in a Fake Party:

Free Massages w/Happy Endings! All Volunteer Masseuses!
Beer For The Adults, Benadryl For The Kids
Special Appearance by Justin Bieber
Special TEENS ONLY Party Room featuring Beer Pong, & Make-Out Cubicles!
No Chaperones in the TEENS ONLY Party Room!
Make Sure To Drink The Kool-Aid!
ADULTS ONLY Party Room features Beer Pong, Strippers, Sex Platforms, & Bondage Cages! Volunteer To Perform ALL NIGHT in a Bondage Cage!
RAINBOW ROOM features entertainments for gays and lesbians ONLY! Be Yourself!
Special Performance by Porn Star Heidi Chambers
16+ Nude Stargazing At Midnight! Special TEENS ONLY Section! Special Voyeurism Section! Orgy begins @ 12:45am!
Voyeurism Room! Bondage Room! Dominatrix Room!
FREE CONDOMS!
16+ Wet T-shirt Contest!
All Volunteer Circle Jerk Competition!
No Means NO! Yes Means OH YEAH BABY!
Special VIRGINS ONLY Room! Just Hang Out, or Lose Your Cherry! It's YOUR Choice!
Special Semen-stration by Jim Behr, Hairiest Man Alive!
Children MUST Be Given Full Dose of Benadryl 30 minutes PRIOR To Attending!