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Let me start by saying that I like Iron Man. I have always liked Iron Man. I even liked to movie starring Robert Downey Jr. I poke fun at the things I like just as much as I mock the things I don't like.
In this first image we see Iron Man (who was immortalized in plastic by Mego Corp. in the 1970's) pulling apart a steel girder with his awesomeness. Problem is, steel doesn't tear like that. I don't know exactly how steel tears, but I don't think it tears like caramel.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Okay here's where we start to spiral down into the depths of my damaged psyche. When I first saw the next image I could have sworn Iron Man was in the stirrups at a gynecologists office. It even looked like Pepper was tossing away used latex gloves at first. I wonder how his exam went? Does he have an iron yeast infection? And why is Pepper making that face? Did Iron Man forget to clean his cave of wonders before the appointment? Come on, Stark! Show some consideration! Nobody wants to smell your rotten metal!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Nothing says Merry Christmas like Super-Heroes. I remember receiving Super-Heroes on more than one Christmas. I'm sure many of you have similar memories. I have always liked this ad with Iron Man wearing an armored Santa jacket & hat. I'd like to have a custom Mego like this.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The final image is my favorite. Many Iron Man fans know of Tony Stark's drinking problem. Well here we see Iron Man smashing through a wall with a loud "KRUNK!" as if to announce his problem to his enemies. Like it's his battle cry. Just imagine he's flying towards the wall like a fucking madman and then BOOM! KRUNK! I bet he's bombed right now. Put down the bottle, Tony! You have to fight crime! You can't be all "krunk"* when you go into battle! Look at his mask. He's flying in more ways than one. Plus he's talking about "regaining consciousness in the midst of a hornet's nest". I'm sure it's not the strangest thing you've found yourself regaining consciousness in, Mr. Stark. Maybe after this battle is over, Tony Stark really will get "krunk". But he's probably "krunk" right now.
(*FYI crazy + drunk = crunk; or krunk in this instance.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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